Why Caesarean Matters
Caesarean birth is a hugely complex and emotive topic that is associated with both positive and negative health outcomes. Women can be left feeling that their body has become a battleground, and it can be hard to distinguish between evidence-based practice and personal opinion.
Why Caesarean Matters aims to navigate the research and put women at the centre of their own care so that their birth can be a positive experience, however it unfolds. The clear and evidence-based discussion addresses the questions that women and their care providers may have, enabling women to make positive decisions and feel supported if a caesarean is needed.
What does it mean to ‘give birth’?
According to the Oxford English Dictionary, it means: ‘to bear a child or young.’1 Mothers who birth by caesarean do this, don’t they? Their baby (or babies) is (are) testament to that. A caesarean section is without doubt birth.
You are the one who grew your baby. And you are the only one who can give birth to your baby. No matter how your baby comes into the world; vaginal delivery, forceps, caesarean, you are the one who gave birth. Rachael Newman, midwife and antenatal educator
Yet many women (including myself) sometimes feel like they didn’t ‘give birth’. What do they mean when they say this?In my opinion, it’s giving birth as power and transformation.Let’s listen to the words of women:
Birth is one of the deepest and most powerful openings of any woman’s life... we walk to the brink, to the edge of our courage, to the edge of the known world, and the women we thought we were. We shed our clothes, our inhibitions and our bodies open. And there in the centre of the blood and the pain, we find the women we are: deeper, stronger, more powerful, more vulnerable than we may ever have imagined. Lucy Pearce2
I had just experienced the most amazing thing ever! I had given birth! [this was a vaginal birth after two caesareans] There is no other experience that can compare to this. I felt physically and emotionally strong. My maternal being was in full force and I now felt complete as a woman. I had finally putMother Nature’s gift to the test and it proved to be everything I had hoped for and so much more. Michelle Quashie3
These are beautiful and powerful descriptions, aren’t they? They are responding to the way that, in our culture,
[birth] is denied. Silenced. Ignored. Measured. Not felt. Not spoken in its fullness... Just think back to the countless times you have heard the phrase ‘doctor delivers baby’... Erm, no.Mother delivers baby. Anyone else catches baby. End of chat. Vanessa Olorenshaw4
Yet as mothers who birth by caesarean, reading these stories and descriptions can feel poignant, painful, and sometimes heartbreaking, or it can feel irritating and incomprehensible. We cannot describe caesarean birth as someone ‘catching our baby’: not in the same way, anyway. We can feel that the paths of these women are very different from our own, particularly if we feel like these very different mothers, who birthed by caesarean:
My humiliation at failing to give birth vaginally caused me to feel less than human and unworthy of love.5
I viewed birth merely as a means to an end and had no expectation or desire that it should be personally fulfilling or special in itself.6
Ironically, however, when we dig deeper we see that these stories of power and transformation through birth have much more in common with caesarean birth stories than we might think. If we take Michelle’s story as an example, she talks about her journey towards a vaginal birth after two caesareans and the power of finally feeling listened to:
I sat in the room with Cathy [my consultant midwife] and the consultant and I cried! Here I was with not one but two ladies that supported my birth choice. The fear and the worry rolled down my face and away from my mind in the form of tears. I began to relax and feel safe.7
Similarly, Lucy notes:
If your own birthing journey was traumatic, know that it is never too late to touch the power of transformation that birth brings us. The healing may happen years after the birth itself, as you find support and witnesses to help you heal and release the energies that you could not process at the time.8
What I see here is that power in birth comes from embracing our vulnerability, as well as our strength. As Brené Brown writes:
...vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears it’s also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love.
However we birth, by caesarean or vaginally, we are all both vulnerable and strong.
As mothers who birth by caesarean, we accept (or request) help from others. By doing so, we are in very good company. It is rare for women to give birth without support from others and the overwhelming majority of women rely on others to hold space for us during birth (whether that is a multi-disciplinary team of healthcare professionals in theatre or a simply a partner or friend sitting in the kitchen in case we need them while birth unfolds at home).
Why do we need people to hold space for us? Because, as birthing women, we are already holding space for our babies. Mothers who birth at home need this, just as much as mothers who birth in theatre. We need partners, caregivers and advocates who walk alongside us, allowing us to be both vulnerable and strong regardless of the outcome, and who offer us unconditional support, without judgement or control.
In caesarean birth, we find power in different ways, such as:
The power of standing in our own corner and asking for what we want (and having that power honoured).
The power of feeling seen and supported by others (a midwife holding our babies to our chest while in theatre, or an anaesthetist reminding our partner to take photos).
The power of feeling heard by friends, family or healthcare professionals if we are upset or traumatised by our experiences, and hearing the vital words:‘thank you for trusting me with how you are feeling’.
The power of telling our story (positive or negative) so that we can empower and support other women who birth after us.
What women say:
I am strong because even though I have never shared this story publicly, I am ready to help someone else out through myexperiences.9
I am strong because I listened to my body and had my c-section just in time to save my baby and me.10
Read more here
en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/give_birth
Lucy Pearce, Burning Woman, p196
strongsincebirth.wordpress.com/tag/informed-choice/
Vanessa Olorenshaw, Liberating Motherhood, p63
Courtney Key Jarecki, Homebirth Cesarean, p35
Magnus Murphy and Pauline McDonagh Hull,Choosing Cesarean: aNatural Birth Plan, p33
strongsincebirth.wordpress.com
Lucy Pearce, Burning Woman, p196
birthwithoutfearblog.com/2015/09/14/i-am-strong-because-i-am-free/
birthwithoutfearblog.com/2015/12/15/i-am-strong-emily-weber/